Conquering bad attitudes may require more than simply changing your thinking. Bad attitudes can be caused, or at least exacerbated, by the devil. Just think about it—when you’re mired in a negative attitude, what are you experiencing?
- Distrust, sadness, discouragement, even despair?
- Negative thoughts about others or yourself?
- Agitations, anger, resentment, unforgiveness?
The list could go on, but suffice it to say that these emotions are not of God. When you’re trying to live a life free of sin, pursuing a deeper union with God, these movements of the heart come from the devil. Acting on these negative thoughts serves to separate you from others—from family, from friends, colleagues, or other parishioners. And the devil wants to separate you. It serves his purpose.
How the Devil Uses Bad Attitudes
It serves the purpose of the devil when you allow your negative feelings and thoughts to control you. Consider the advice of Screwtape to Wormwood in The Screwtape Letters:
“…One can therefore formulate the general rule; in all activities of mind which favour our cause, encourage the patient to be unself-conscious and to concentrate on the object, but in all activities favourable to the Enemy bend his mind back on itself. Let an insult or a woman’s body so fix his attention outward that he does not reflect ‘I am now entering into the state called Anger—or the state called Lust.’ Contrariwise let the reflection ‘My feelings are now growing more devout, or more charitable’ so fix his attention inward that he no longer looks beyond himself to see our Enemy or his own neighbours…” [Emphasis added.}
The “Enemy” refers to God. It’s to the devil’s advantage, and to the eternal disadvantage of your soul, to not be aware of the movements of your heart. But if you’re not aware of what’s going on, how can you even begin to fight back? This is where discernment of spirits comes in to help identify desolation (the bad attitude) and its source.
Discernment of Spirits in Bad Attitudes
In his rules for discernment of spirits, St. Ignatius of Loyola describes desolation as follows:
I call desolation all the contrary of the third rule, such as darkness of soul, disturbance in it, movement to low and earthly things, disquiet from various agitations and temptations, moving to lack of confidence, without hope, without love, finding oneself totally slothful, tepid, sad and, as if separated from one’s Creator and Lord.
In addition to distrust, discouragement, despair, and agitation, desolation may include a lack of confidence in God’s love for you or for others. Whatever the focus of the desolation, it’s important to nip it in the bud.
Quash the Bad Attitudes Before They Become Bad Actions
Why is it important to quickly put the kibosh on desolation? Screwtape’s advice to nephew Wormwood continues…
Do what you will, there is going to be some benevolence, as well as some malice, in your patient’s soul. The great thing is to direct the malice to his immediate neighbours whom he meets every day and to thrust his benevolence out to the remote circumference, to people he does not know. The malice thus becomes wholly real and the benevolence largely imaginary [Emphasis added].
The overall approach of the demons is to help convert bad attitudes into bad behaviors, causing more sin and separation in the Mystical Body of Christ. Feeling agitated today? Just wait till the next unsuspecting victim says something that you can misconstrue! Angry about something? Go after it aggressively—don’t bother having a reasoned discussion. Does the sight of that one person cause you resentment? Spend time thinking about how despicable they are, rather than praying for them, and for conversion of your own heart. That’s what the devil wants.
Be Aware, Understand, Take Action
Don’t give it to him—don’t give the devil what he wants. Take St. Ignatius’ advice to be aware, understand, and take action. Be aware of what’s going on inside of you. Pay attention to what’s happening in your heart—is it God’s peace and love, or the devil’s agitation, temptation, or discouragement? Understand what’s going on—why do you feel the way you do right now? Then, take action; reject the desolation of the demons. Accept God’s love and consolation for you.
We might call this spiritual emotional intelligence. Becoming more self-aware of what’s going on, and how it integrates with one’s spiritual life can lead to greater freedom. By being aware, understanding, and taking action quickly, you can escape the clutches of the demons.
Reject, Rebuke, and Renounce the Spirits Behind the Bad Attitudes
Consider using or adapting the following process, with God’s grace, to move out of desolation.
In the name of Jesus reject, rebuke, and renounce any spirits attempting to drag you down. Name them, based on the emotions you’re experiencing. Examples might include aggravation, agitation, anger, resentment, unforgiveness, discouragement, confusion, critical judgment, doubt, etc. Then, in the name of Jesus, take authority and command those spirits to go away and leave you alone—now. Dash them against the foot of the cross of Jesus Christ.
Accept and reaffirm the truth, in the name of Jesus, citing appropriate Scripture passages. You may have your favorite passages that you refer to from time to time. If so use them. Fr. Esper’s book, Saintly Solutions to Life’s Common Problems, has suggestions of passages in it for a variety of challenges individuals might face. As well, consider asking your spiritual director or confessor for some recommendations.
God’s Grace Will Free You from Bad Attitudes If You Let It
With God’s grace, you can free yourself from bad attitudes, sinful thoughts, and negative thinking that lead to sinful actions. Allow Our Lord to soften your heart (cf. Ezekiel 36:26) and make room in it for His love and grace. Take it to prayer. Talk to Him about what’s going on, and ask for help. He doesn’t want you to live in desolation and separation from others. He needs you to be a joyful disciple, radiating his love for others, drawing them to Him for His greater glory and their salvation.
A final note: sometimes, when we read this kind of article, we can think of the many others who could benefit from the advice in it. However, we probably ought to pray to God, asking for illumination of our own conscience, to show us how we personally might benefit from it. (cf. Mt 7:5). Our Lord can free us from our bondage if we only let Him.
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. – James 4:7
3 thoughts on “Conquer Bad Attitudes Before They Conquer You”
This was very helpful. I’ve been in torment for 3 days. I watched a movie (a comedy) on Sunday that I used to enjoy, but when I suddenly realized that a bad part I’d forgotten about was about to occur. I turned the channel and came back afterward, but in retrospect, I should have stayed away. I’ve been full of anxiety since, even not going to Holy Mass on Monday and Tuesday (because I couldn’t receive Holy Communion). I went to Adoration today and felt better, but I have great difficulty in discerning whether this is my own guilt or from the evil one. I just can’t discern and it’s terrible. This article helps a bit.
Thank you for your comment. I am sorry to hear of your experience. Perhaps some time in confession with a good priest will help you sort through all of this and overcome the desolation you are experiencing. Praying for you. – God bless you – Dom
There’s much good news in what you shared. You remembered something bad in the movie, turned away from it, and came back only after it was over. You learned something about yourself and turning away from evil. You experienced growth in your relationship with God. Rejoice! And trust God will continue to aid you in forming a more perfect relationship. It is a process; growing towards perfection. No one gets there overnight.