I never tire of looking at the wonderful images of God’s creation, which He gifted Michelangelo to be able to paint on that magnificent Sistine Chapel ceiling! In creation, God formed the suitable partner for man; He then instructed the husband and wife to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28).
Though humanity veered off course from God’s original plan of lifelong, monogamous marriage, Jesus called us back and raised marriage to a sacrament. As the Wedding at Cana (Holy Land images, 1, 2, 3) reminds us, marriage remains God’s wonderful gift – always to be celebrated.
The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops has even set aside time for us to celebrate these sacred realities:
The observances of National Marriage Week (Feb. 7-14) and World Marriage Day (Sunday, Feb. 13) are an opportunity to focus on building a culture of life and love that begins with supporting and promoting marriage and the family. Our theme for 2022 is “Called to the Joy of Love.”
The last day of National Marriage Week certainly has a longstanding amorous connection: “Saint Valentine of Rome, is a third-century Roman saint widely celebrated on February 14 and commonly associated with ‘courtly love’” (Catholic Online).
Proper Understandings
Church teaching magnificently and rightly proclaims the sanctity of each human life and the sanctity of the transmission of each new human life in marriage. Though any improper use of the sexual faculties is seriously wrong, each human life is to be treasured, no matter its origin.
“Family” means the one man and one woman joined by the exclusive lifelong bond of marriage – as well as their children; that “family” is the fundamental building block of society.
For various reasons, there is confusion as to what the Church proclaims about marriage, family, and human sexuality. This confusion necessitates that we be familiar with basic sources.
While it does not replace the Vatican’s 1992 Catechism of the Catholic Church, the Vatican’s 2005 Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church is also absolutely faithful to Church teaching but presents it in a more “user friendly” manner. What follows is paraphrasing in an effort to make the Compendium’s teaching about marriage/family and human sexuality even more user friendly.
The Truth about Marriage and its Celebration
Starting with the book of Genesis, the Old Testament prepared us to understand the relationship of Jesus Christ with His bride, the Church – namely, with us.
While humanity has strayed, God’s original plan for our happiness has never been abrogated. It remains lifelong, indissoluble, monogamous, fruitful marriage between one man and one woman, called to continue His work of creation. While Original Sin and actual sin (e.g., adultery, polygamy, contraception, divorce) threaten God’s plan, He forever calls us back. In addition to calling us back, Jesus raised marriage to a sacrament with abundant graces.
Only through a proper appreciation of God’s wonderful gift of marriage and family (i.e., the “domestic church”) can we properly understand all other relationships and appreciate the incredible sacrifice of those who forego the great good of marriage/family and choose celibacy for God’s glory.
There is a proper Catholic form for marriage. Spouses are the actual ministers of the Sacrament of Matrimony when they give their free and irrevocable consent to each other, and the Church publicly celebrates the marriage of a man and woman in the presence of a priest or deacon (together with at least one official witness).
A Hard Teaching
We know that not everyone teaches or understands the truth about marriage and family, as does the Church. It should not be surprising that the Church requires special approval for one of its children to marry a non-Catholic. Both parties must accept that marriage is lifelong, monogamous, indissoluble, and geared for the procreation and education of children. The Catholic party is bound to continue as a Catholic and to raise the children in the Catholic faith.
If serious difficulties later arise, the Church does allow physical separation of spouses but forbids entering new unions – unless the Church has declared the marriage to be null. A declaration of nullity simply acknowledges that the couple had not properly formed the sacrament bond, from the beginning, due to some serious personal defects or omissions.
Those who civilly remarry without a Church declaration of nullity are not eligible for absolution or Holy Communion while the situation continues. Because the Church still loves them parentally and abundantly, her intention is to stress the seriousness of God’s plan for marriage even while acknowledging their irregular situation (Compendium, 337 – 350).
The Truth about Marriage & Family
God established marriage and family for our good and for the procreation and education of children. A man and a woman united in marriage – with their children – constitutes a family.
No matter our age, we are bound to honor our parents – it is a divine Commandment – as well as others with legitimate authority.
As per #458 of the Compendium, the family is the primary building block of society, which means that society also has duties toward marriage and family (cf., 455 – 462)
The Truth about Life and Human Sexuality
From its first moment, human life must be rightfully and absolutely respected, because it is sacred. Direct abortion and direct sterilization are absolutely forbidden (Compendium, 466, 470, 472, 477).
While society may not appreciate the great goods of marriage, Jesus raised marriage to a sacrament. God calls husbands and wives to cooperate in His very work of ongoing creation. It is mind boggling that the Creator of all the universe makes such a call to us! The marital embrace is an act of incredible holiness. The unitive and procreative aspects of each marital act must not be separated.
Our masculinity or femininity are absolutely part of God’s marvelous plan. While not all are called to marriage, all are called to accept their masculinity or femininity as fixed by nature. Sexual acts are reserved to wives and husbands united in marriage and must always be open to new life. Any other use of the sexual faculties – even within marriage – are to be excluded.
Whether single, married, or living a consecrated life, all are called to chastity, the proper integration of our sexuality. The Sixth Commandment (i.e., “You shall not commit adultery”) is broadly understood to prohibit all sins against chastity (e.g., adultery, masturbation, fornication, pornography, prostitution, rape, homosexual acts).
The Ninth Commandment calls us to a purity of heart, a virtue that directs us away even from thoughts about these sins. In combatting the “principal sins against chastity,” God gives us His grace, the sacraments, prayer, self-knowledge, asceticism, and the virtues.
While these words may be foreign to many ears, civil society has a responsibility to foster an environment that encourages chastity. A hard sell these days.
The Truth about Children
While no one has a “right” to a child, children are the supreme gift of God in marriage. If for some reason God does not give this gift to a marriage, the couple may wish to try adoption, foster care, or some other important service, allowing for their spiritual fruitfulness.
Each child has the right to be born via the loving embrace of mom and dad who are married to each other. Yet no matter how each new human life came to be, it is owed uncompromising respect from its first moment of fertilization.
For truly serious reasons, husbands and wives may utilize natural fertility awareness techniques and avoid conjugal relations during fertile periods. Direct sterilization and contraception are absolutely prohibited, as are artificial insemination and in vitro fertilization.
While they may get treated dismissively, adultery, cohabitation, and divorce are among the “offenses against the dignity of marriage” (Compendium, 502 and 487 – 502; 527 – 530).
Conclusion
As per Pope Saint John Paul II, “The future of humanity passes by way of the family” (Familiaris Consortio, 1981). Family is the source of the vocations to priesthood, religious life, and marriage, which the Church needs for survival. Thank God that the Catholic Church has always been the stalwart defender of the truth about the sanctity of life, marriage, and the family!
13 thoughts on “The Truth about Marriage, Family, and Life”
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Karen,
While the Compendium can be thought of as a “user friendly” version of the Catechism, my article paraphrased “in an effort to make the Compendium’s teaching about marriage/family and human sexuality even more user friendly.” For what the Church says about “femininity” and “masculinity,” I refer you to those original documents.
God bless,
Joe
Please give me your answer to my question.
I did a search based on your suggestion and I found this: “If the two sexes are designed by nature for a homogeneous organic co-operation, then the leading position or a social pre-eminence must necessarily fall to one of them. Man is called by the Creator to this position of leader, as is shown by his entire bodily and intellectual make-up“. So apparently the Catholic Church teaches that women are inferior to men.
Please define ‘femininity’ and ‘masculinity?’ Give specific examples of behavior in each category.
Cute.
I assume you noticed they are affirming our comments now?
“It takes families to raise a village.” I wish I said that!
I copied from this guy: http://www.catholiclane.com/poem-it-takes-families-to-raise-a-village/. Again-Joe, great article. Guy, Texas
Joe-Thank you for this clear crystal article. It takes families to raise a village. By law, the government attempted to: 1. say women and men were no different; and 2. abolished traditional marriage. Then society began to – literally – fall apart. Today’s USA? Yes, but also the communist/socialist govt of Bolshevik Russia immediately after the 1917 revolution. Lenin et al tried this-and by the early 20s there were tens of thousands of unmarried, poor, abandoned ‘summer brides” and thousands of orphan young male prostitutes. God via Mother Nature always triumphs. Guy, Texas
“2202 A man and a woman united in marriage, together with their children, form a family. This institution is prior to any recognition by public authority, which has an obligation to recognize it. It should be considered the normal reference point by which the different forms of family relationship are to be evaluated” (Catechism of the Catholic Church).
“870 ‘The sole Church of Christ which in the Creed we profess to be one, holy, catholic, and apostolic, . . . subsists in the Catholic Church, which is governed by the successor of Peter and by the bishops in communion with him. Nevertheless, many elements of sanctification and of truth are found outside its visible confines'(LG 8).” (Catechism of the Catholic Church).
I agree. “The Truth” is Catholic teaching.
Is this comment going to get deleted now like 10% of my recent comments?
“Family” means the one man and one woman joined by the exclusive lifelong bond of marriage – as well as their children; that family is the fundamental building block of society.
Very blessed, Joe, thank you.