Jordan and Diana: A Thirteenth-Century Love Story

The annals of medieval history contain many love stories. Most of the well-known tales involve romantic love, such as the troubled and tragic twelfth-century account of Abelard and Héloïse.

But there is also a different genre, the spiritual love story. This is exemplified by the thirteenth-century figures of St. Francis and St. Claire of Assisi. Growing up together, they inspired and encouraged each other in their radical commitment to the religious life which became the Franciscan Order.

In the sixteenth century St. Teresa of Avila and St. John of the Cross were similarly close and encouraged each other in the establishment of the Discalced (Reformed) Carmelites.

There is a much less well-known story which occurred in the early years of the thirteenth century, as the Dominican Order was being established. This story involves Jordan, the Master General of the Order, and Diana, a nun in Bologna.

What makes their story particularly interesting is that some of their letters have survived. So, rather than hearing about their friendship through other’s words, we can see elements of it for ourselves.

Diana degli Andalò

Diana (1201–1236) was a younger daughter, born into a branch of the noble Carbonesi family of Bologna. She grew up in a life of wealth and privilege, noted for her beauty, education, and social skills. In modern terms she would probably be described as a “socialite.” She was destined to make a good marriage to advance the reputation and interests of her family.

At the age of 17 she heard a preacher from the newly founded Order of Preachers (Dominicans) and it profoundly touched her. She looked at her life and found that there was something missing. So, she began to wonder about religious life.

The following year she met St. Dominic, the founder of the Dominicans. He was so impressed by her that he allowed her to make vows to become a Dominican nun, even though there was not yet a Dominican convent in the area to receive her.

Having made her vows at the age of 18, Diana lived at home for the next three years, waiting for a convent to be opened. She also worked on her parents to donate the money to build the convent. They seem to have been happy to do so until they discovered that she planned on joining the new convent.

Diana’s family was furious with her religious aspirations and life at home became difficult for her. Eventually, at the age of 21, she decided to run away. She planned a picnic trip with some friends to an out-of-town shrine and then ran to a nearby Augustinian convent.

Diana’s family was incensed. They sent soldiers to “rescue” her. Diana was so opposed to the rescue that she had to be literally dragged from the cloister. The violence was so severe that she suffered broken ribs and injuries that remained with her for the rest of her life.

This episode illustrates an important fact about why medieval convents were often designed like fortresses. In the medieval period women were often at risk of being kidnapped from convents. Families would be inspired to do so, to force marriages upon the young women which would advance family interests. Impoverished nobles would also try to target young women, as kidnapping and forcibly marrying an aspirant nun could be a way of trying to extort a dowry from families.

Sadly, Diana’s convent was not fortress enough. She was dragged back home and bedridden for months recovering from her injuries. As soon as she was able to hobble, she made another break for the convent.

At this point her family seemed to have decided to give up. Perhaps they had finally decided to honor their strong-willed daughter’s wishes. It has even been speculated that Diana’s injuries may have been so severe as to have already damaged her value in the marriage market, so there was little point in refusing her religious aspirations.

Whatever the reason, at 21 years of age Diana found herself finally able to pursue her desire to be a Dominican sister. It is at this point that she wrote to Jordan, the Master General of the Dominican order. Reminding him of her situation, she asked his advice about what she should do next.

Jordan of Saxony

Jordan (1190–1237) was a brilliant academic and gifted administrator, who was inspired by St. Dominic’s preaching. He entered the order in 1220. When Dominic died in 1221, Jordan was elected to replace him as the new head of the order. His meteoric rise shows the enormous esteem which his contemporaries had for him.

Jordan’s character is detailed in the thirteenth-century Dominican account The Lives of the Brethren. It shows that he was extremely generous to the point of giving his own clothes away. Whenever he visited a friary, he would always go first to talk to the sick in the hospital and then the youngest novices. The stories about him are full of examples of his compassion and humaneness.

When Diana wrote to him, Jordan took the issue seriously. Within a year the Dominican convent of St. Agnes opened in Bologna. Diana, and four other women inspired by her, moved into the convent in May 1223. To ensure that the new sisters got off to a good start, Jordan arranged for three Dominican sisters to join them from Rome.

Jordan’s support for Diana was the start of a correspondence between them, and a connection which shines through the prose of their letters.

One of the challenges confronting the early Dominicans was that many women wanted to join the order. This was not appreciated by some of the male friars, as they looked upon the women as a “distraction” from their real work. Instead of supporting the sisters, male friars wanted to be spending their time in university cities recruiting academics and preaching to students. They considered the sisters to be almost literally a waste of their time.

Jordan was resolute in defending the sisters and instructing all the Dominican friars to support them. But other friars thought that they knew better. This caused Diana constant worries. Sometimes friars interfered in the convent, trying to prevent new sisters from taking their vows. In each case Jordan defended Diana, rebuking the other friars for their neglect.

In 1226 a remarkable situation arose, when Pope Honorius III wrote to Jordan commanding the Dominican friars to support Diana and the sisters. It is not clear if this was due to Diana appealing directly to the pope. Doing so would certainly be in character with the passionate, educated, and strong-willed woman that Diana was. Whatever its cause, Jordan was to henceforth repeatedly cite this letter to remind the other friars of their responsibilities to Diana and the sisters.

The Letters

The correspondence which has come down to us consists of just over 30 letters. Sadly, the letters only include Jordan’s replies, as none of Diana’s own letters have survived. However, her thoughts and character can be seen through the replies which Jordan makes to her.

The letters are focused on their shared passion in spirituality. Diana seems to have had a propensity for the extreme fasting and mortifications which were popular at the time. This is not surprising as Medieval Spirituality seemed to be constantly at risk of turning religion into an Olympian endurance test.

Jordan is adamant about the wrongness of such an approach. In 1223 he writes to tell Diana that doing positive acts of charity is far better than doing negative acts of mortification. In 1225 he stresses the need for moderation, but especially as regards not neglecting food and sleep. Holiness is better cultivated through meditation and sisterly charity towards each other, rather than through harsh penances.

In 1226 he reminds her that holiness is about avoiding the two extremes of negligence and overzealousness, and so she must take extra care to ensure she is sleeping enough. He sums this up in another letter in 1227 in which he urges her, ”Cultivate your heart, don’t plough your body.” In 1228 Jordan reminds her that practicing humility, patience, and charity towards the sisters in the community is where true perfection lies, not in extraordinary acts of self-denial.

Another theme that comes through the letters is Diana’s struggles with abandonment. At times this is due to the actions of the friars. In 1234, eight years after the pope’s command to the friars not to neglect the sisters, the Dominican General Chapter passed laws doing precisely that. This was only possible because Jordan was absent through illness at the time. As soon as he heard about it, Jordan wrote to reassure Diana that he had cancelled the new rules. Comforting as his letter must have been, it could not have been completely reassuring for Diana to see that senior friars were still negative in their attitudes towards sisters like her.

In the correspondence we see glimmers of the fact that Diana also struggled with spiritual abandonment. In 1226 Jordan directly addresses the issue, insisting that when you cannot “feel” God it is not a sign that you are a sinner, or that God has had enough of you. Instead, the loss of feelings is a perfectly normal stage of the spiritual life. This sounds remarkably like the spiritual experiences which in later centuries would be described as a “dark night of the soul.”

Jordan reassures Diana not to worry about her feelings of abandonment by God. With humans we are familiar with the idea that distance makes the heart grow fonder, so it is with spirituality. When you cannot feel God, it is an opportunity for people to commit themselves selflessly, growing into a deeper spirituality.

The details in their correspondence provide a fascinating vignette of medieval life. We see bits of sermons and spiritual counsels. We also see the minutiae of daily life. In one letter Jordan asks if the sisters could care for an orphan girl, and if so, can Diana ensure that she speaks German once a week so that she does not lose her cultural heritage.

In other letters they write about deaths and bereavements, each suffering the losses of people very dear to them. They also write about how much they look forward to being able to meet and talk again. In one particularly poignant letter Jordan apologizes for leaving the city without coming to say goodbye. He starts with standard excuses of being busy and having to leave urgently. But he then adds a sheepish confession that he just could not face saying goodbye, yet again, to such a dear friend.

Epilogue

Diana died in June 1236, at the age of 35. We know nothing about the circumstances of her death, other than that she was revered, admired and her death was much lamented by the convent and the city. It was probably due to an illness which came upon her suddenly, as Jordan’s last letter arrived after her death and showed no awareness of a serious problem.

At the time of Diana’s death Jordan was visiting Palestine. He died eight months later, drowning in a shipwreck on the way back to Europe. As far as we know, he had not yet received news of Diana’s death.

Jordan was beatified in 1825 and is commemorated on the 13^th of February. Diana was beatified in 1891 and is commemorated on the 8^th or 9^th of June.