Your Eternal Destiny is Found Where Your Eyes are Looking

I do not know who the Jones’s are, but I keep hearing how everyone wants to keep up with them.  I have to wonder ‘why?’

Truth be told, I think that there are four corners to sin.  The final corner, or nail in the sin coffin is earthly comparison.  The first three corners are pride (lack of humility), lack of charity, and self-will.

The 4 Corners

When we are proud, we possess an excessive preoccupation with ourselves and our own importance, achievements, status, or possessions. This sin is rebelliousness against God.  Through pride we attribute glory and honor to ourselves that only God is due.

Pride is the opposite of humility, which is the key to spiritual growth and holiness. The humble person places all glory and honor on God, where it belongs.  All service and attention to God and others is the key to charity.

The person who lacks charity simply is not concerned about God or others but, usually, only about himself. To have charity, however, is to be filled with love and respect for God and others.  Charity means serving both God and others as often as possible. St. Paul identifies charity, or love, as the greatest virtue upon which all other virtues are based (1 Cor. 13:13).

Self-will, on the other hand, means that a person defiantly seeks to follow his or her will and has no concern or regard for the Will of God.  This is just the opposite of the central theme in the lives of most, if not all, saints.  The person who lacks charity is usually obsessed with himself.  Being full of pride, such people are lacking humility and, predictably, only want things their way.

Now, given the nature of these previous ‘three musketeers of sin,’ what is this sin of comparison that completes the four corners of rebellion against God? Isn’t it natural to compare oneself to others?  Is not our entire educational and work system built on comparing people?  In fact, wouldn’t it be impossible to improve ourselves and grow without others as reference points?

The problems lie not with the act or mentality of comparing oneself but, more importantly, with the purpose of that comparison.

Two Parables and a Choice

In the famous Parable of the Vine Workers (Mt 20:1-16) workers were thankful for being blessed with pay for their labors.  But they became upset when they compared their favor with an apparently greater favor given to others.  In the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Lk 15:11-32) a previously content and thankful son changed his tune when he compared the favors his father gave to him to those bestowed on his rebellious, ungrateful brother.  Finally, in the equally famous, but true account regarding Martha and Mary (Lk 10: 38-42), one sister becomes indignant when she compares her situation to that of her sister.

What, we may ask, do these stories tell us about the danger of comparison?

First of all, let’s look at what these stories have in common. (Yes, you read that right, I am going to compare three stories to discover what is wrong about comparing!)

The Vine Workers

In the Vine Workers story, the workers were initially grateful with the opportunity and blessing of earning pay for their needs.  They were appreciative and they recognized that not everyone was so blessed. However, they turned their focus, their eyes, from that gratitude to those around them.  When they did so their human nature began to discern unfairness and offense. They were no longer grateful, humble, unselfish, and respectful toward their employer. Instead these workers were filled with envy, jealousy, greed, selfishness, ingratitude, and arrogance.

Although everyone was paid the same amount, the now angry workers felt unfairly treated because the other workers worked less for the same pay. They now envied the good fortune of those workers.  They were jealous of losing the special status they felt for working a full day.

The now disgruntled workers desire for money was wrapped in a desire to hog as much as they felt they deserved, to the exclusion of others.   In feeling this way, these workers lost sight of the initial blessing and generosity of their employer.   They insolently believed themselves privileged to demand that the employer distribute his pay according to their perception of what was right.

The Prodigal Son

Another name for the Prodigal Son story is the parable of The Two Brothers. This is because an important side story to the return of the remorseful son is the indignation of the loyal son.  In the side story, the second son remained loyal and dedicated to the father.  One would assume that this loyal son acted out of respect, love, and a sense of duty and gratitude to the father. However, once he got wind of the father’s all-out bestowing of favors to his ungrateful brother, this loyal son changed his tune.

Like the angry workers in the first parable, the loyal son was initially content, loyal, and grateful. Then he began comparing and measuring his lot by the standards of the world.  Suddenly, his mind and emotions were wrapped with the anger of indignant comparison and perceived unfairness.

Martha and Mary

Finally, in the story of Martha and Mary, Martha did not think that it was fair that her sister Mary sat listening to Jesus while she, Martha, slaved over chores.  While she was probably an excellent homemaker and host, Martha lost it when she felt slighted by her lot and by the way she was being treated in comparison to her sister.  Rather than being grateful to have Jesus as a close friend, Martha only saw what she perceived as unfairness and offense at being treated differently than her sister.

Scripture Speaks

We are warned to not regard each other from a worldly point of view (2 Cor 5:14), and to avoid becoming conceited and envying others (Gal 5:26).  And we are told to trust that the Lord will give us what we deserve (1 Cor 15:58).  We are also told that God knows what we want and that He will give us those things if it is for our good (Ps 37:4).

Ultimately, comparison can lead to sin when it is done with a personal agenda. If we compare ourselves to others with material, selfish, greedy, rebellious, and self-obsessed motives, sin will surely follow and accompany that comparison.  If, however, we compare ourselves to others with a spirit of gratitude for what we have and a desire to help others, then we are channeling the natural, human pattern of comparison toward the service of God.

Conclusion

Sin does not enter our lives unattended or unsupported.  Usually, it is built on self over God and others.  It comes from a lack of love and humility, and a pattern of seeking greater honor and benefits to ourselves over God and others.

Spiritual growth, however, is built on increasingly focusing on pleasing God and melting our will into His. It is grounded in recognizing and accepting our weakness, sinfulness, and imperfection. It grows when we strive to purge ourselves of those marks on our character and, increasingly, live to love and serve God and others.

Our eternal destiny lies where we look.  If we continually look to God in love, obedience, service, a desire to please, and for guidelines to follow, we will avoid becoming mired in the weeds of comparison.  If, however, we wrap ourselves in those weeds, we will be lighting a match surrounded by the gas of human frailty and selfishness.

Look to Heaven and you will grow in that direction.  Look to outdo and be superior to others, and you will grow toward the kingdom of self known as hell.