Why You Should Keep a Godly Dating Journal

As a young Catholic woman, navigating the modern dating world definitely comes with its personal challenges. But with each mishap and closed door, I am reminded to keep my gaze on the Ultimate Lover, Christ Himself. I must learn to trust in Him more and more with each passing day, especially when things do not go my way and I am called to wait… again. As I recall from Sacred Scripture, “Be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:11).

I must admit, to “be still” can be hard when our hearts are longing for change. But I learned that in the waiting season and stillness, God works His transformation in our souls. Through our prayerful heartaches, tearful pleas, and daily longing, He stoops down to give us a heavenly embrace as we ultimately rely on Him with one of the biggest decisions we can ever make in our lives: our future spouse.

Thus, if we want a sure way to keep track of our heartfelt petitions, past feelings, and insights along with present hopes that lead us to the future, I am telling you there is a way. And that way is keeping a dating journal. From personal experience, I learned that keeping a dating journal where I write letters to God about dates and the workings of my heart and its honest feelings reminds me to stay true to myself and God. Because I know that married life is a vocation, choosing the right person with whom to take that journey is not only an exciting adventure but is also a serious, life-altering decision.

To all the women reading this who are longing for a spouse, I would say to keep in mind as well that this person will be the father of your future children. This person will be with you during the times that you are too sick to care for yourself and need his compassionate help. This person will be with you when you are elderly and lose those close to you. So, I encourage you to find a man with true religious character and integrity. Someone who is a smart, kind leader and a fierce protector who will guide you and your family on the path to Heaven.

Through my dating journal, I have had a glimpse into my heart. Sometimes only letters, journaling, and prayers have that capability. I learned about what went wrong with past relationships. But honestly, my own words even revealed my flaws and shortcomings about which I need to pray and on which I need to work to become the good and holy wife and mother God calls me to be.

For one thing, I learned that patience is the key to any successful relationship. Patience not only with yourself and your beloved, but a relationship cannot stand unless you pace yourself slowly and with careful thought, conscious effort, and heartfelt prayer in the discernment process. I cannot stress enough for you to ponder the following questions. Does this person bring you closer to God or farther from Him and His Church? Because of this person, is my life filled with prayer and Christ’s internal peace or do I constantly feel weighed down and less of a Catholic? Of course, every relationship has its ups and downs and requires work. That being said, the love should be mutual and you should be able to see your love for each other in action. After all, as Christ loves His Church is how your future spouse is called to love you.

So, whatever happened to you this Saint Valentine’s Day – a good date or a bad date or maybe no date at all – write it down. Let your words be a window into your heart where God can shower You with His love and blessings. He is watching your love story unfold like the delicate rose that you are. If love did not find you this year, wait for next year. Remember, patience? Trust in God’s perfect timing. He is always with you, holding you in the palm of His Sacred Hands. Below are a couple of Bible verses about trusting in Him with His plan for our lives.

“…Do not be afraid; just have faith.” (Mark 5:36)

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, on your own intelligence rely not; In all your ways be mindful of him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5,6) 

I hope this final note of encouragement from Saint Therese of Lisieux will give you a boost of confidence in God’s plan for your life.

“God would never inspire me with desires which cannot be realized; so in spite of my littleness, I can hope to be a saint.”