The Alternative to Road Rage

Road Rage: A Lack of Love

They are everywhere. We cannot deny it. Cars are all around our daily life (at least for me, living in Metro-Detroit). Some are decent drivers. Some are crazy scary drivers. Some are aggressive drivers. Others are overly cautious and slow. All drivers make some sort of mistake at some point.

How do we react to the souls driving the cars? When it comes to road rage, I am not raging at the car. I am raging at the one driving the car. Yes, sometimes a honk is necessary. But cursing? Flipping them off? Riding their tail? Cutting someone off? Calling a driver an “idiot,” or “moron”?

I will not deny it. Traffic stinks. Car sickness is a real thing. Flat tires happen. Red lights can be miserably long. Car accidents happen. But are these good enough reasons for road rage? I would say no. It is a disposition and action that is lacking love.

Looking At Other Cars with Love

Let us zoom out from our own little cars to look at the bigger picture. Me driving my family van does not make me the center of the world, where all cars should let me scooch into their lane. In my world, cars before me and behind me should drive at the perfect speed. And there is always a green light. Yet, outside of my own little mobile vehicle (which is my parents, as I do not yet have my own…) is a whole world. I am talking about souls upon souls. People. Real people who are made in the image and likeness of God (see Genesis 1:26).

If I believe that we are made in the image and likeness of God, then I should be treating each car (that has a person in it!) with deep respect and virtue. I already told you what road rage is. What then, is the alternative? There is one alternative, but several ways to practice it.

Firstly, patience and kindness are virtues. Plain and simple to remember. To exercise these virtues, I can make driving a sort of prayer. For example, I could bless each car that passes me. It is amazing to think of the hundreds of people who are in the cars around me and even more people who are in the buildings that I pass by. I am nearly never around as many people as when I am driving.

So, this is my chance. My alternative. I can pray in the secret hiddenness of my car. Perhaps that means I pray for each car I pass or each car that passes me. I could also pray for all the people in the buildings that I pass. Furthermore, think of how often we pass cemeteries. Passing by the bodies of the dead, I have the opportunity to pray for them and the souls in purgatory.

Then, there are the familiar vocal prayers that I can pray as I drive. The Rosary is the biggest one. The Divine Mercy Chaplet is another popular one. I can always do repetitive prayers, saying “O Jesus, I surrender myself to You. Take care of everything.” Or, “I am all yours my mother [Mary], and all that I have is entirely yours.” Even just saying holy names. Jesus! Mary! Joseph! I can pray to as many different saints as I can think of.

Our Lack of Love will Come to Light

I want to drive as if I am with someone sitting next to me. There are things I would not dare tell someone in person but would when hidden behind the wheel. I try to remain calm (or at least act calm and pray for calm if I am not feeling calm) and controlled when other drivers get on my tail or yell at me. I can even vocally forgive them saying, “Jesus I forgive the person in the blue Equinox who just cut me off.” On the road, I need to constantly forgive those other drivers or even j-walkers who I almost hit! I cannot just forgive, but I can also be the one to apologize when I make a mistake. Even though the other driver cannot hear my apology, it is God who hears me.

There is nothing concealed that will not be revealed, nor secret that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have said in the darkness will be heard in the light, and what you have whispered behind closed doors will be proclaimed on the housetops (Luke 12:2-3).

That verse from Luke totally applies to driving. I am in a concealed space with closed doors. I may think no one can hear my curses or the music I am listening to. I may think no one can see my angry face or if I pick my nose! Well…all that is concealed will be revealed.

Love

Furthermore, as a Christian, I am not called to be polite on the roads. I am called to much more. I am called to love. As I drive, God, let me intentionally love. Not begrudgingly letting someone pass into the lane in front of me. And not just being polite. Instead, I have the opportunity to acknowledge an actual person I am letting in my lane with love and welfare for that soul. Again, the virtues of patience and kindness are necessary because love is patient and love is kind. Look to the famous verses and relate and practice love when on the road:

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, [love] is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

Love is everything! Love is God. We are called to love in all that we do. Love is the alternative to many things, vices, failures, and actions. What, then, is the alternative to road rage?

Love.