Show God Your Pessimism Too

travel

This December, a series of daily Advent, devotional postings is running from December 1st to December 25th. Journey beside Mary, the Mother of God, as she waits for the birth of Jesus.

STRENGTH

Scripture: “How long, Lord? Will you utterly forget me? How long will you hide your face from me?” (Psalm 13:2).

Quote of the Day: St. Teresa of Avila said to God, “If this is the way you treat your friends, it’s no wonder you have so few!”

Song Suggestions:
“Never Alone,” by BarlowGirl
“Blessed Be Your Name,” by Matt Redman

Questions: Am I honest with God? Do I tell Him how I really feel?

MIND

Today, we will get a closer look at the three magi.

“We’ve been wandering for months!” Balthazar shifts his weight on the camel. His bottom aches no matter how much padding and cushions he adds on the back of his camel to soften his travels. “I tire of waiting and wondering!”

Casper and Melchior glance at each other knowingly as their weight shifts back and forth on their camels. Balthazar has always been the complainer.

“What is wrong with waiting and wondering?” Casper glances behind him at Balthazar’s pouting face. “Are they not both good things?”

“They are both wise things to do, but that doesn’t mean they are pleasant!” Balthazar pulls at his violet and scarlet cloak, coated in dust. “I have been waiting for months and that blasted star is still thousands of years away! I cannot take it!”

“You must if you want to see the king,” Melchior states matter-of-factly. He has always been one for short plain sentences.

Balthazar holds in a growl.

“I say we have only a month longer!” Casper declares, ever the optimist. He pats his camel, Esta. “Soon we will be in Palestine!” He adds to his camel, “Won’t we, Esta?”

“I hear Palestine is a dreary land with a mad king. Suppose we aren’t welcomed there?” Balthazar blows out a long breath.

“King Herod will welcome us,” Melchior concludes, assuming Herod is the mad king Balthazar speaks of. “We are rich foreigners bearing gifts and wisdom.”

“I would gift Herod with some of the gold, then.” Balthazar looks at Melchior’s saddle, packed with bundles of the most exquisite riches in the world. “Otherwise, Herod might interpret the myrrh as an insult.”

“Myrrh is costly!” Melchior exclaims.

“But it’s for burying the dead,” Balthazar explains. “It symbolizes death.”

“Death and kingship,” Melchior corrects.

“I say we save all the myrrh for the new king. A child will not be insulted by myrrh,” Casper says, patting Esta. “A true king understands that death is real and that it cannot be avoided. A true king embraces death because he knows the value of life. He does not see death as an enemy! They even say the God of the Jews can raise the dead.”

Balthazar gives a low growl. “These months spent with these two will be the death of me,” he mumbles. “Or the death of them,” He adds thoughtfully, tilting his head.

HEART

You may be in the same waiting stage as the magi. One in which the star is visible, but still seems so far away. Perhaps in the meditation, you caught onto the different dispositions each of the three magi has. As Balthazar waits, he complains. As Casper waits, he is ever positive and optimistic. As Melchior waits, he states facts and reality.

This is the classic pessimist, optimist, and realist. Take a moment to think of your own personal journey of waiting. Are you pessimistic? Do you complain? Do you have a positive viewpoint? Are you simply noticing your journey as it really is?

Our journey of waiting is likely a combination of all three dispositions. Often, we go through a cycle of optimism to dreary complaining.

Take the time to write down or at least list your complaints about the journey you are on. Go ahead and list all of your fears and negative assumptions. Then, list plainly what your current situation is. If it is awesome, write it down. If it is truly horrible, write it down. The main thing is, to be honest with God, our Friend. He doesn’t want to hear what we think we ought to say. Rather, He wants to hear what is really on our hearts and minds. And if you are honestly pessimistic, give it to Him as you give honest praise.

You will find that this honest cycle of praise and lament is a reflection of the Psalms. That’s why our prayer today includes Psalm 42 because it expresses both hurt and longing; fear and confusion; praise and blessing.

SOUL

Like the deer that yearns
for running streams,
so my soul is yearning
for you, my God.
My tears have become my bread,
by night, by day,
as I hear it said all the days long:
“Where is your God?” (2-4)

My soul is cast down within me
as I think of you
from the country of Jordan and Mount Hermon,
From the Hill of Mizar.
Deep is calling on deep,
In the roar of waters:
your torrents and all your waves
swept over me.
By day the Lord will send
his loving kindness;
by night I will sing to him,
praise the God of my life.
I will say to God, my rock:
“Why have you forgotten me?”
Why do I go mourning,
oppressed by the foe?”
With cries that pierce me to the heart,
my enemies revile me,
saying to me all the day long:
“Where is your God?”
Why are you cast down, my soul,
why groan within me?
Hope in God; I will praise him still,
my savior and my God. (7-12)

“O King of the nations, the only joy of every human heart; O Keystone of the mighty arch of man, come and save the creature you fashioned from the dust.” (December 22nd Vespers Antiphon)
 
Mary, teach me how to wait.

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2 thoughts on “Show God Your Pessimism Too”

  1. Pingback: THVRSDAY EDITION – Big Pulpit

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