Prayers of Petition

I have written about all but one of the basic prayers over the last several months.  In this article I cover the final type of prayer, and the one that people find most natural: prayers of petition.

Simple but not easy

Petitionary prayer is simple: you ask God for something you want. We usually begin asking for what we want with our first pangs of hunger or loneliness, crying for the comfort of our parents.

I cannot remember my first petitionary prayer, but I suspect it came with more sincerity than “Now I lay me down to sleep…” Hopefully it was more heartfelt than “God bless Mommy and Daddy…” but from what I remember of my youngest self, I wouldn’t bet on it.

I am reminded here of Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn (I often am, actually, on many different occasions).  Huck decides to pray for fishhooks and is disappointed to learn that he was supposed to be praying for spiritual gifts.

A less disillusioned author than Twain might have inserted a character to tell Huck that his prayer might be answered indirectly.  The character might have told Huck that a “boy wanted” advertisement might be the answer to his prayer.  As an errand boy he could use his wages to buy fishhooks and line and more.

But that was not how Twain’s mind worked.  He had no particular interest in explaining – or understanding – more fully how God works. And, in truth, the novel was probably better served by preserving Huck’s naiveté.

But sooner or later, we are confronted by the boundaries of petitionary prayer.

The Problem of Getting What You Want

We grow up with cautionary tales against unrestrained granting of wishes. Wishes from a magic lamp or fish bone or some ancient relic usually always bring disaster.  But, with luck, there is that final third wish one can use to set things right by wiping out the other wishes.

This is why it is comparatively easy to break ourselves of the (mistaken) notion that petitionary prayer is somehow like a wish. It is a gift from God that allows us to participate in the proper ordering of the universe. So we do not always pray for what we want so much as for what we need – something to equip us for the work we have to do.

This includes refreshment and re-creation. Praying for fishhooks – actual or metaphorical – is not forbidden.  But it is just not the only sort of petition prayer we should employ. As with so many other things, balance is key.

Bargaining

Children especially are prone to bargaining when they approach petitionary prayer. It is a natural human trait – to promise one thing in return for another.

The ending sequence of the 1978 Burt Reynolds movie The End provides an amusing example of petitionary prayer.  It illuminates the human propensity to bargaining often associated with petitionary prayer.

At the beginning of the movie Reynolds receives a terminal diagnosis.  Unsuccessful in his attempts to commit suicide, he encounters a failed suicide played by Dom DeLuise.  DeLuise decides he will help Reynolds by killing him.

After it turns out the fatal diagnosis is mistaken, Reynolds escapes from a boat and begins to swim to shore.  As he does so he makes extravagant promises to God if God will only help him reach the shore. As he gets closer to the shore, Reynolds repeats his promises, but with a significantly smaller gratuity.  This pattern continues until he reaches the shore. At this point his offering of gratitude has shrunken to very little indeed.

Suddenly, however, the crazed killer played by DeLuise appears.  He chases the Reynolds character down the beach waving a weapon. As he runs, Reynolds begins to pray and promise again, the promises growing more extravagant as DeLuise gets nearer.

It was ever thus.

I have been aware of the error of bargaining in petitionary prayer for decades.  Yet I still find myself doing it. It may be rather less overt than promising a large gift or more diligent attendance at Mass, but down there in the bass notes of my prayers there is something left, even if it is only something akin to “Won’t you miss my prayers if I become disillusioned?”

Persistence

But as natural to humanity as bargaining may be, it is not really a proper part of petitionary prayer. God may appreciate offerings, but he cannot be bribed.

Jesus is very explicit in the parable of the unjust judge (LK 18:1-8) that we must be persistent in prayer. I have been assured many times that Jesus is not comparing God to an unjust judge; quite the contrary. If an unjust judge can give in to persistence, how much more likely is it that a just God will grant the persistent?

But why?

Persistence is a measure of need, of determination, and, in the end, of trust.

It is also an avenue of learning. If we return again and again to the same petition, to the same pleadings, to the same object, we are placing ourselves in contact with God.  And no matter how or why we approach God, there is an opportunity for growth, for discernment, for learning, for experience.

Asking for something once and then giving up gives cause to wonder how much you really need or want it. Persistence in petition puts us in contact with the depth and foundation of our need.  That awareness leads us to confront the suitability of our request, and whether it is really warranted.

Sometimes It Seems There Is Nothing We Can Do

Huck Finn prayed magically with the vague notion that fishhooks would present themselves somehow out of the blue.  In our maturity and experience, however, we do expect at times to look for opportunities to work with God to answer our own prayers. But we also know that sometimes there is nothing we can do. A terminal diagnosis is usually terminal.  A shattered relationship and deep estrangement is very difficult to repair.  And an un-repairable car really is un-repairable. Sometimes something can be accomplished over time to ameliorate such things. But time can be a cold and distant thing when needs are immediate and great.

The more hopeless the situation seems, the more appropriate it is to petition the Lord to answer us in our need. Our expectations may be limited by our experience and imagination, but nothing exceeds the creative powers of God. When all seems dark and barren, God is still light and life and abundance. These are the moments in which the widow’s practice in persistent prayer come into focus as the best preparation we could have for this life and for our hope in the next.

Prayer of Petition:
Lord, help us pray with all our heart and all our mind and all our soul for as long as we are able. When our strength or courage or faith wavers, strengthen our determination. When our determination fades, let us remember the persistent widow and join our hearts to hers, following her example of determination. For we know that while all things human around us fail, you will yet be faithful to your promises an d hear us when we cry out to you.  Amen.