“My Prayer Seems Dry…”

When someone tells me that their prayer seems dry, we need to consider an array of possible contributing factors. Dryness in prayer can result from one or more reasons among a variety of potential causes.

What Can You Do When Prayer Seems Dry?

We have more control over some factors leading to aridity than others When your prayer seems dry, it can be due to factors over which you have a great deal of control. These might include, for example, your prayer practices, disposition toward prayer and God, your lifestyle and manageable, but unmanaged, distractions.

Your Disposition Toward God

Your disposition toward God plays a big part in prayer and whether your prayer seems dry. Are you willing to develop an intimate relationship with Him? How much do you desire Him and growth in your love of, and relationship with, Him?

As well, we all carry wounds around. Sin wounds us, whether it was our sin or the sin of others. Often you might be carrying around a wound or two that need healing. Yet, if you’re not open to His healing, transformative grace, He’s not going to force the issue. So, how vulnerable are you willing to be with Him? Are there some parts of your life or your background you’re holding back from Him? Take it to prayer and ask Him to reveal this to you.

The Way You’re Living

If your life doesn’t reflect the Gospel truth, then finding that your prayer seems dry shouldn’t be a surprise. In other words, prayer is about a relationship with God. If you’re not living in a right relationship with Him to begin with, prayer will reflect that. Are there areas in your life that are in conflict with the faith, the commandments, the precepts?

One example of discord can be living in unforgiveness or resentment. We’re told to forgive seventy times seven and to pray for our persecutors. Are you holding on to grudges, resentment or unforgiveness? Not only will prayer seem dry, but multiple exorcists have indicated that this represents a portal for the enemy. Take it to prayer–ask the Lord to show you whom you need to forgive. You might be surprised at a name or two that pop up from the past.

Prayer Practices

The way you prepare for and engage in mental prayer can make a huge difference in whether you experience aridity or not. Outside of your prayer regimen, how much time do you spend viewing news and secular entertainment programs? What about the types of music you’re listening to? What else are you doing with your “free” time? Do these habits lead you to peaceful recollection in the presence of God? Or do they create a sense of disquietude, anxiety and restlessness? If the latter, then you might consider changing or eliminating some of these habits.

Each day, do you look over the passage or passages of Scripture you’ll be praying with the next day, to get a preview and an overview? And before you actually enter into your mental prayer, how do you compose yourself and place yourself in the presence of God? Do you take a moment or two to get into a relaxed posture, and then open up with a prayer, asking for the Holy Spirit to anoint your prayer and help you pray? These practices don’t take much time, but they can help immensely.

Similarly, your consistency or lack of it, in showing up for prayer can also have an impact on aridity. Making a commitment to prayer and sticking to it will result in blessings. This means you’ll want to set aside time each day—preferably the same time each day—and actually show up for prayer. Stick with it.

Finally, if you’re new to prayer, you may find that you simply need some direction in how to begin to pray with Scripture. Fortunately, some great resources exist for coaching you in ways to begin mental prayer. One, for example, is Dan Burke’s book,  Into the Deep, which describes what’s been known as Lectio Divina. David Torkington has a nice book out on prayer–How to Pray–as well, and there are many others such as those by Fr. Jacques Phillippe, Fr. Thomas Dubay.

Other Areas You Might Have Some Control Over

Some factors contributing to aridity involve circumstances where you may have less control, such as fatigue or illness, and external events occurring near your prayer space. If you suffer from lack of sleep, being overworked, being ill or recovering from illness, don’t be surprised if your prayer seems dry. Can you rearrange your activities and schedule to allow for more rest? Can you find ways to reduce the time spent in work activities? Note as well, that if your “free” time activities are eating into your sleeping time due to binge watching YouTube videos, you know what you need to do.

Occasionally, noise and commotion near your prayer space may impinge on your solitude and make it difficult to pray. Can be you find another place to pray, or set your prayer time at a different hour to avoid the noise? Even if you can’t change the place or the time, then follow the advice of the masters and just keep gently turning your attention back to the Lord.

Distractions

Besides noisy surroundings, other distractions can create challenges for you in prayer. Do you have an active imagination? If you’re praying with Ignatian blessed imagination, that might be good. But at times, an over-active imagination can lead to one idea bringing up another, and another, and…soon you’re far away from your spiritual focus. As well, when your prayer seems dry, ask yourself where your focus is. Does it lie predominantly on the pursuit of a relationship with Him? Or do the “four P’s” have more draw for you?

Inordinate attachments create distractions in prayer. Are you attracted to the new computer, phone, or tablet you just acquired? How about that hobby? As I write this, it’s springtime in the Rockies and many turn their thoughts to fly fishing in their favorite streams. What are you thinking about when you go to prayer? What’s your primary focus that you think about day-in and day-out? Is it getting in the way of your prayer?

You have distractions? Welcome to the human race. We all have some. But, with distractions generally, it’s best to ignore them, gently turning back to the Lord as many times as you need to, during your time of prayer.

Take Your Concerns to the Lord

Consider, as well, anxiety, agitation, discouragement or other negative emotions that you may be experiencing from some interaction, for example, with another. This non-spiritual desolation can cause you to be “off your game” spiritually when you go to prayer. It can present an opening for spiritual desolation as well. Have you taken it to the Lord, relating to Him what’s going on, what happened, how you’re dealing with it? Have you asked Him what He wants to show you from it? You’ll probably need to address this with Him in order to get back into the sacrament of the present moment and to be open to the graces available there. So, talk with Him about it in your prayer time.

Take Your Concerns to Your Spiritual Director

In addition to the factors discussed above, there can be other causes of dryness in prayer. For instance, if you’ve been faithful in your prayer over time, God may be calling you to more simplified prayer than the relatively structured, discursive approach you may have become accustomed to.

Whatever the underlying cause for it, if you have a spiritual director, he or she can help you address aridity in your prayer. Based on the specific circumstances you face, a director will be able to provide guidance for addressing your situation. Talk about it with them, listen to their advice, and learn from it.

The distractions are only on the surface of your soul. They are a cross, but you must learn to despise them. Your prayer goes on in the hidden depths of your soul  (Bl. Columba Marmion, OSB).