Some parents spend countless hours trying to come up with just the right name for a son or daughter. But for some parents it’s easier. Dad names the sons and mom names the daughters.
Every once in a while, however, you meet someone and can’t help but wonder, “What were that person’s parents thinking when they gave their kid that name?!”
Just Google “goofy first names” if you want a good laugh. Rock stars and movie stars have given their children some really odd names. But it doesn’t just end with celebrities. James Stephen Hogg (governor of Texas from 1891 to 1895) named his daughter Ima (with a long i). Imagine going through life with a name like Ima Hogg!
Or check out “100 of the Weirdest Baby Names in History,” written by a young lady named Emma Bennett. (Note that this is not an endorsement of Bennett’s website.) Some of the names are pretty far out!
‘Call me Ismael’
First names were the subject of discussion within our family not too long ago, which is what prompted this article. While there was agreement that parents get to choose names for their children, there was disagreement over to what extent this ‘right’ should be exercised.
As Ismael (from the classic novel “Moby Dick”) might say, our first names confer an identity on each of us. They should not be taken lightly. Think about the names Abraham, Adolf, Barack, and Donald. All four of these names immediately bring to mind specific individuals.
According to a recent article at Crisis, “Muhammad is now the most popular baby boy’s name in the United Kingdom.” This shows there are now quite a few Muslims in the UK. It also shows that many Muslims take their religion seriously – something Christians might want to think about.
In fact, the article goes on to suggest that perhaps Catholics and other Christians should take their Christianity more seriously. The article contends that Catholics should look to the Bible for inspiration in picking names for both boys and girls. Cardinal Dolan also remarked recently that naming children after saints is a Catholic custom also worth recovering.
This is sound advice (my wife and I gave all three of our sons biblical names), but some of the names listed in the aforementioned article (and some saint’s names) are a bit odd, so some discretion might be called for. Some of the boys names mentioned in the article (Aquila, Crispus, for instance) may sound bit odd to modern ears. Or maybe it’s just my ears!
The article, however, stops short of delving into the various reasons parents consider in picking names for the kids. And it does not mention some of the problems associated with kids’ names.
Name Considerations
According to a YouGov June 2, 2025 survey, 73% of people like or love their first name. Nineteen percent are neutral in how they feel about it, and another six percent dislike it or hate it. So six percent of parents mess up when it comes to naming their kids.
Parents choose names for their children for many different reasons. Personal likes/dislikes of certain names is usually a big factor. Mom or dad may have encountered someone at some point in their lives with a name that they thought was really cool. If so, one of their children may end up with that name.
But parents should consider, too, whether or not their child is going to be happy going through life with the name they’ve picked! A name may have been cool at one time, but it may not be so cool now, or 30 years from now.
Social convention should be a consideration as well. Rational parents really should not give their child a name that could hurt the child’s chances of fitting in and being accepted by society, both as a kid and as an adult. Bozo, for instance, is good name for a clown, but not for a child who may end becoming a congressman, a doctor, or a priest!
Some parents, however (recall Stephen Hogg!), apparently don’t give a hoot about rational thinking or social convention.
Ancestry and Culture
Ancestry is often an important consideration in picking names. When both parents share a common ancestral heritage they often choose a name that honors that common ancestry. But even some cultural first names are no longer fitting.
The name Adolph for instance, became an extremely rare first name in Germany following WW II. And a child named Muhammad is not going to be readily accepted by all in a heavily majority Christian nation. I imagine a child named Mathew, Mark, Luke, or John might not be very readily accepted in an Islamic country.
But where there is no shared, common ancestry, choosing a first name that honors only one parent’s ancestry is not very wise. This is because it slights the ancestry of the other parent.
For example, Liam might be a good first name for a boy whose parents share a common Irish ancestry, but what if only mom is Irish? Say the boy’s last name is Wiśniewski or Garcia. In such a case, Liam is just not a very fitting first name.
Take Bernardo O’Reilly, the character played by Charles Bronson in the 1960 movie, “The Magnificent Seven.” Bronson’s character explains his name at one point in the film. He says his father was Irish and his mother was Mexican and there he was – caught right in the middle.
Some might argue that the name Liam Wiśniewski calls attention to the boy’s dual Irish-Polish ancestry. And on the surface this sounds like a valid argument. But it is a superficial argument.
Liam Wiśniewski?
The name Liam calls special attention to his Irish ancestry while ignoring and neglecting his Polish ancestry. And while it’s true that his last name is Polish, friends and relatives will not be calling him “Liam Wiśniewski” throughout his life. They will all call him Liam. This shines a bright light on his Irish ancestry.
Grandpa and Grandma Wiśniewski, especially, may feel somewhat slighted (and even hurt) having a grandchild named Liam. They are, after all, Polish and have no Irish ancestors. So they may be (rightfully) peeved that Liam’s parents (especially their own son!) chose to honor his wife’s Irish ancestry and ignore his Polish ancestry.
Liam will also likely attend various family get-togethers while growing up. And some of his Polish relatives may not be all thrilled calling one of their relatives Liam. Liam’s Irish relatives, on the other hand, will be pleased as punch to have Liam around.
Caught in the Middle
This is a little bit of tribalism. And just like Bernardo O’Reilly, little Liam would be caught smack dab in the middle of it.
The dual identity conferred on Liam may also backfire from time to time. When Liam does or says something stupid at a family get together, some family member may quip “That’s the (Irish or Polish, depending on which family he’s with) side of him coming out!”
Some may say this is bigotry, but that would not be accurate. It’s just teasing.
So, for the sake of argument, let’s say mom and dad unwisely decided to name their son Liam. Is there a way to ‘soften’ the slight to Liam’s Polish ancestors? Certainly.
A nickname or a shortened form of Liam, such as Lee, can smooth over any ruffled feathers. Such a solution is both rational and sensible. Most first names get shortened (i.e., Michael to Mike, Joseph to Joe, Alfonso to Al, Frederick to Fred, etc.) all the time. So allowing his Polish relatives to call Liam “Lee” is just the ticket.
(If, however, Liam’s Irish mom objects to Lee or a nickname, mom would be displaying bigotry. Mom would be saying, in essence, “my heritage and my Irish ancestry and heritage must be honored above all his other ancestors. So don’t you dare call him anything but Liam.”)
Of course, any hurt feelings could have easily been avoided had Liam’s parents just used some common sense when they named him.
Mixed Ancestries
And what about when both parents are of mixed ancestries? Given today’s mixed cultures many people are often this, that, and something else. And there may even be many other something elses.
So say, for instance, Liam’s mother is part Irish and part French, while his father is part Polish, part English, part Swedish, and part German. If they name their son Liam, they are honoring the mother’s Irish ancestors while ignoring mom’s French ancestors, and dad’s English, Swedish, and German ancestors and heritage.
And does it really make sense for Liam to go through life with an Irish first name when he is, at best, one-fifth or even one-third Irish?
A better name choice for a son or daughter of mixed heritage is one that is biblical or one not readily identified as coming from any specific culture.
But even in situations where parents share a common ancestry a “neutral” name can still be a good choice because it avoids any ethic stigmatization. My wife’s grandparents, for instance, were both 100 percent Irish, yet they chose non-Irish first names for all of their 12 children. And my neighbors, legal immigrants, both 100 percent Latvian and now American citizens, gave their three sons Americanized-biblical first names instead of Latvian first names.
God’s Commandments
God’s Commandments and Catholic teaching also provide some advice in naming kids.
In the first three Commandments, God tells us how to honor Him first and foremost. Then in the fourth Commandment He tells us to honor our fathers and mothers. Marriage is addressed in the ninth commandment in which God tells husbands and wives they must remain faithful to one another.
So according to the progression in God’s laws, God comes first, parents come second, and spouses come third. This is logical: without God none of us would be here; without parents, sons and daughters (who become husbands and wives) would not be here.
The “Catechism of the Catholic Church” affirms this: “(2197) . . . God has willed that, after him, we should honor our parents to whom we owe life and who have handed on to us the knowledge of God.”
So Catholic teaching says Liam’s mom and dad have a filial duty to honor both of their sets of parents. They also should honor the elders (grandparents, great grandparents, and so on) on both sides of their family.
Husbands and wives do become one through the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony. And this bond is sacred. But their duty to honor God first and their parents second precedes their marriage vows.
As the Catechism states, “(2215) Respect for parents (filial piety) derives from gratitude toward those who, by the gift of life, their love and their work, have brought their children into the world and enabled them to grow in stature, wisdom, and grace. “With all your heart honor your father, and do not forget the birth pangs of your mother. Remember that through your parents you were born; what can you give back to them that equals their gift to you.”
So a son, as a husband, still owes filial piety to his parents throughout his entire life. So, too, because he is one with his wife, he now also owes filial piety to his mother-in-law and father-in-law. The daughter, while now a wife, also still owes filial piety to her parents – and she also now owes filial piety to her mother-in-law and father-in-law. (How this respect and honor plays out is clearly spelled out in the Bible, in Sirach 3:1-16.)
The fourth commandment also extends the honor due one’s parents to grandparents and other ancestors. As the Catechism states, “(2199) The fourth commandment . . . requires honor, affection, and gratitude toward elders and ancestors.”
So husbands and wives, because they are now one, must honor each other’s family heritage and ancestry equally. Placing one spouse’s ancestry above the other gives undue respect to that spouse’s ancestry and family heritage, thus taking away from the honor and respect due the other spouse’s ancestry and heritage.
The long and short of all this is that the names we give our children should honor all of our ancestors and not just one specific ancestral heritage.
The Bottom Line
With these considerations in mind, spouses should exercise some common sense in choosing names for their children. A name honoring a common ancestry can be fine. But when parents are of different ancestries, they should choose names that do not elevate one ancestry and heritage above any of the others.
Social convention should also be a consideration. Stay away from goofy first names or made-up first names.
Above all, Catholics and other Christians might do well to pull out their Bible when thinking about what to name a child. And thanks to the internet, mom and dad can even do a search of boy’s names or girl’s name that honor God. He is, after all, the reason we are all here.
