When I was 9 years old in 1968, I did not know any children whose parents were not married to each other. Since that year (also the year that Pope Paul VI’s Humanae Vitae met with unbelievable opposition), rates of cohabitation, divorce, and annulment skyrocketed, while rates of marriage have dropped precipitously (even while American society has adopted a definition of marriage inconsistent with Catholicism). It is too easy to say how different a world it is!
The Pharisees approached and asked, “Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?” They were testing Him. He said to them in reply, “What did Moses command you?” They replied, “Moses permitted him to write a bill of divorce and dismiss her.” But Jesus told them, “Because of the hardness of your hearts he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother [and be joined to his wife], and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate” (Mark 10: 2 – 9).
A declaration of nullity means that what appeared to be marriage was never a marriage. It is absolutely not a divorce nor permission to dissolve a marriage when tensions have gotten too hot. It means that the Church has retrospectively judged something to have been so seriously amiss from the very first moment that a marriage was thought to have begun.
With an annulment, a divorced Catholic is allowed to remarry in the church….In 1968 only 338 annulments were granted in the United States [Though the numbers have come down, as of 1997] the U.S. church approves more than 50,000 every year. ‘An annulment is, essentially, a conclusion based upon evidence that (what) would appear to have been a solid and binding marriage was, in fact, not,’ said Monsignor Edward Scharfenberger, judicial vicar of the Dioceses of New York [now, bishop of Albany, New York]….U.S. churches grant 75 percent of all Catholic annulments around the world.
Phil Lawler (Catholic Culture, 2/1/21) recently looked at perspectives on declarations of marital nullity from the three most recent Holy Fathers, primarily evidenced by annual addresses to the Church’s highest court for marriage cases (i.e.,
- Saint Pope John Paul II: 1979, 1980, 1981, 1982, 1983, 1984, 1986, 1987, 1988, 1989, 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005
- Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI: 2006 – 2013
- Pope Francis:2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021)
Pope Francis has certainly been very direct about wanting the process for declarations of nullity to be expedited, but Lawler maintains that the Holy Father has contradicted the 1930 encyclical on marriage from Pope Benedict XV (cf, Why Johnny Can’t Understand the Meaning of Marriage: A Primer on Casti, Connubii, 2/2/14).
What follows is a very cursory look at the most recent addresses to the Roman Rota from each of the last three Holy Fathers.
Saint Pope John Paul II
- I would like to place certain considerations concerning the moral dimension…, especially the duty to conform to the truth about marriage as the Church teaches it.
- individual or collective interests can induce the parties to resort to various kinds of duplicity and even bribery in order to attain a favourable sentence. Nor are canonical proceedings, in which an attempt is made to discover the truth about whether or not a marriage exists, immune from this risk….
- some voices have been raised proposing to declare marriages that have totally failed null and void. These persons propose that in order to obtain this result, recourse should be made to the expedient of retaining the substantial features of the proceedings, simulating the existence of an authentic judicial verdict. Such persons have been tempted to provide reasons for nullity and to prove them in comparison with the most elementary principles of the body of norms and of the Church’s Magisterium. The objective juridical and moral gravity of such conduct, which in no way constitutes a pastorally valid solution to the problems posed by matrimonial crises, is obvious….
- I have referred several times to the essential relationship that the process has with the search for objective truth. It is primarily the Bishops, by divine law judges in their own communities, who must be responsible for this….Bishops are therefore called to be personally involved in ensuring the suitability of the members of the tribunals…and in verifying that the sentences passed conform to right doctrine….
- The judge who truly acts as a judge, in other words, with justice, neither lets himself be conditioned by feelings of false compassion for people, nor by false models of thought….unjust sentences are never a true pastoral solution, and that God’s judgment of his own actions is what counts for eternity.
- people sometimes presume to separate Church law from the Church’s magisterial teaching as though they belonged to two separate spheres; they suppose the former alone to have juridically binding force, whereas they value the latter merely as a directive or an exhortation….It is true that the entitlement to timely justice is also part of the concrete service to the truth and constitutes a personal right. Yet false speed to the detriment of the truth is even more seriously unjust” (St Pope John Paul II, 1/29/2005).
Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI
- Faith in God, sustained by divine grace, is thus a very important element….In saying this, there is no intention to affirm that fidelity and likewise the other properties are not possible in natural marriage, contracted between people who have not been baptized….Yet, closure to God or the rejection of the sacred dimension of the conjugal union and of its value in the order of grace certainly makes arduous the practical embodiment of the most lofty model of marriage conceived by the Church according to God’s plan and can even undermine the actual validity of the pact, should it be expressed — as the consolidated jurisprudence of this Tribunal assumes — in a rejection of the principle of the conjugal obligation of fidelity itself, that is, of the other essential elements or properties of matrimony….Those saints who lived the matrimonial and family union in the Christian perspective succeeded in triumphing over even the most adverse situations, at times achieving the sanctification of their spouse and of their children with a love that was always strengthened by solid trust in God, by sincere religious devotion and by an intense sacramental life. These very experiences, marked by faith, make us understand that the sacrifice offered by the abandoned spouse or the spouse who has suffered divorce, is still precious today, if — recognizing the indissolubility of the valid matrimonial bond — they refrain from “becoming involved in a new union…. In such cases their example of fidelity and Christian consistency takes on particular value as a witness before the world and the Church” (John Paul II, Apostolic Exhortation Familiaris Consortio [22 November 1981], n. 83).
- It is only through the flame of charity that the presence of the Gospel is no longer only a word, but reality lived….[In the matrimonial union] faith makes the love of the spouses grow and brings it to fruition, making room for the presence of God the Trinity and making married life itself, lived in this way, ‘good news’ in the eyes of the world….I certainly do not intend to suggest any facile automatism between the lack of faith and the invalidity of the matrimonial union, but rather to highlight how such a lack may, although not necessarily, also damage the goods of the marriage, since the reference to the natural order desired by God is inherent in the conjugal pact (cf. Gen 2:24)” (Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI, 1/26/2013).
Pope Francis
- The new sacramental union, which follows on from the declaration of nullity, will certainly be a source of peace for the spouse who has requested it. However, how can it be explained to children that, for example, their mother, abandoned by their father and often without the intention of establishing another matrimonial bond, may receive the Eucharist with them on Sunday, whereas their father, living with them or awaiting the declaration of nullity of marriage, cannot participate at the Eucharistic table?…. The concerns of the Synod Fathers and the maternal care of the Church in the face of so much suffering have found a useful pastoral instrument in the Apostolic Exhortation Amoris laetitia. In this document, clear indications are given so that no one, especially the young and the suffering, be left alone or treated as a means of blackmail between separated parents (cf. Apostolic Exhortation Amoris laetitia, 241).…
- The Church is a mother and you, who have an ecclesial ministry in a sector as vital as judicial activity, are called to open yourselves up to the horizons of this difficult, but not impossible, pastoral area which relates to the concern for children as innocent victims of many situations of rupture, divorce or of new civil unions (cf. ibid., 245)
- I take this opportunity to exhort every bishop — constituted by Christ the Father, Shepherd and Judge in His own Church — to be increasingly open to the challenge of this issue ….I remember that, shortly after the promulgation of the brief process, a bishop called me and said: ‘I have this problem: a girl wants to get married in the Church; she was already married some years ago in the Church, but she was forced to get married because she was pregnant… I did everything, I asked a priest to act as judicial vicar, another to play the part of defender of the bond… And the witnesses, the parents say that yes, she was forced, that the marriage was null. Tell me, Your Holiness, what shall I do?’, the bishop asked me. And I asked: ‘Tell me, do you have a pen at hand?’ — ‘Yes’ — ‘Sign. You are the judge, no fuss’. But this reform, especially the brief process, has encountered, and still encounters, a lot of resistance. I must confess that after its promulgation I received many letters, I don’t know how many, but a lot. Almost all of them were lawyers who were losing their clients. And there is the problem of money. In Spain they say: ‘Por la plata baila el mono’: the monkey dances for money. The saying is clear. And sadly, this too: in some dioceses, I have encountered resistance from some judicial vicars who, perhaps, lost some power with this reform, because he realized that the judge was not he, but the bishop.” (Pope Francis, 1/29/2021).
Comments
It appears to me that Phil Lawler is correct in raising concerns about declarations of nullity. And while I have been guilty of making lawyer jokes, I am quite uneasy with the Pope Francis’ using “the monkey dances for money” in an official speech on so serious a matter.
I trust that it is obvious to Pope Francis that far more Herculean efforts and prayer are needed for the preservation/repair of marriages – for the sake of the couple themselves and certainly for their children.
My children and children-in-law did not grow up in a world where divorce was so uncommon as it was in 1968. Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.
22 thoughts on “Buyer’s Remorse? Marriage, Divorce, and Declarations of Nullity”
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Guy,
I needed that reminder about retaining a sense of humor! My favorite line from your first article: “there were monogamists who played major roles in our nation’s storied birth and growth, although this included relatively few politicians, actors, actresses, celebrities, talk show hosts, and journalists.” Indeed!
https://the-american-catholic.com/2018/06/25/out-of-the-hetero-monogamy-closet-im-here-shes-dear-get-used-to-us/
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Joe:
I am of the old school. (In 1968, I was a big bad 16 year old !). Maybe that’s why we resonate; I really liked, and more importantly, believe I can profit from your article. and speaking of the old school, here’s something for the youngsters to ponder: “Repetition is the Mother of Learning.” Thanks, Joe
Aye Captain & Bob K,
Thank you for your comments.
Coming from an Irish family with lots of first cousins, I was on the lower tier age wise. Back in ’68, it always seemed the coolest people were those just a few years older!
Since 1968, there has been incredible “experimentation” to supposedly enhance the model that God gave us for marriage/family. Though perhaps well meaning, many have truly, truly suffered from resultant changes. None more so than children – including adult children.
Those of us who know the blessings of marriage authentically proclaimed (one man/one woman, open to life, indissoluble, lifelong) owe it to our children & grandchildren to witness it.
God bless.
Bob K, Joe, Capt, Vic, K et al, Some thoughts on that one man/one woman idea:
https://the-american-catholic.com/2018/06/25/out-of-the-hetero-monogamy-closet-im-here-shes-dear-get-used-to-us/
https://the-american-catholic.com/2019/02/08/family-we-dont-need-no-stinkin-families/
Everyone-Have a fullofwonder weekend. Guy, Texas
I like how you deal the matrimony cards squarely, showing all who sit at this table they all hold like hands; of course, it’s how you play that determines the take. It’s ironic that the CC probably married more closet gays than could ever be counted, only to have that unenviable revelation quietly rear its head under the guise of non consummation. With 20% of the ten commands slated to counter the naturally sinful propensity to stray, one has to wonder what belies the nature of the institution one signs up for that requires so much regulatory oversight. I imagine living in a dead marriage without grounds to utilize annulment must produce in the two persons, a shedding of necrotic emotions that invariably wash over any children present. Their view of marriage, family, love and stability must be warped beyond telling. The other shoe, divorce, presents a traumatic break that exposes what otherwise lies half concealed. You can’t fake love nor hide decay. I think it fair to say that not everyone is cut out for marriage – the question is: do they have the right to try. Expecting everyone to be an Olympian, to have what it takes to have and hold until death is a sin of pride. Better to show the world you can do it, then ask permission to marry after keeping it together over a long haul, than putting the crown on and saying I will – and not – than saying I’ll try – then proving it. Beware of vows.
Sorry O.P., but your point is eluding me. My main point is that “Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.” Thanks.
Joe
AOP is describing what might happen in an actual marriage, in painfully descriptive terms that anyone in a marriage of many years can understand. I admire his poetic language and it obviously comes from the bitter well of experience, either his (hers?) or that of loved friends he has seen up close.
Actually married people have never had a hand in formulating Catholic doctrine on marriage. Some time ago the Church recognized this and put married couples in charge of Pre-Cana. There must be an informed response to what he is saying.
Agreed, Joe.
Texas grandad,
This Brooklyn native and Pennsylvania resident is more and more convinced that your Texas is the best of the 50! Four years ago, Grandma and I were blessed to be on a NJ pilgrimage to the Holy Land. By chance, our group was joined to a Texas group – a truly inspiring group of people!
God bless Texas!
The demonic plan for the world’s darkness today is less human beings. Kill them once alive, in womb or outside, or do all you can to see to it that fewer new humans are conceived. Easy divorce, easy and/or faux annulment, abortion , euthanasia, contraception all fit into the program whose aim is that there are less human beings made in the image of God and/or who are populating His earth which is “pleni sunt caeli et terra gloria tua” [funny or sad this is the democrats’ plan too?] , who each can do good actions on this earth unique for each human being. Person XYZABC123 is killed or never allowed to live or who is never conceived, then the unique XYZABC123 good never gets done- and its effects on bringing others home to God never exist or are nullifed. Great article Grandpa Joe! Thought provoking. Grandad Guy, Texas
“Children of annulment” . . . I’d like to see how one explains this to children. And I’m talking about what you would consider properly dispensed annulments. Seems to me children of divorce are not as harmed.
Aye Captain!
You raise a crucial point. It does not seem to me that sufficient attention/concern is raised about children (including adult children) in these situations. “Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.”
Joe
That’s one aspect of it.
Another is how to explain to the kids their status. The Church’s legalistic answer is that children of annulment are still considered children of a validly contracted marriage but any child past the age of 8 will see the contradiction. I haven’t seen anyone deal with this parenting issue in more than a perfunctory fashion.
Aye Aye Captain!
Our sights definitely don’t seem properly set on kids and efforts to preserve families. Sorry to be so redundant, but “Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.”
Joe
“Canon Law 1103: A marriage is invalid if entered into because of force or grave fear from without, even if unintentionally inflicted, so that a person is compelled to choose marriage in order to be free from it.”
Pope Francis says (above) that the Bishop stated that the parents agreed that the girl was forced into marriage. But Phil Lawler knows better?!
You may like lawyer jokes, but Lawler jokes are probably more appropriate for this article, Joe. Phil Lawler is motivated by hate for Pope Francis (not love for the Church), but don’t take my word for it. Take a look at everything the guy writes! Then remember, “I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it.”
Victor,
Thanks for your comment.
Joe
Kyle,
Not sure if you missed it, but my bottom line is that “Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.”
Joe
Hi Joe,
Would you find a civil divorce more acceptable if it had language stating that a marriage never actually took place? The differentiation seems trivial to me at best, and I can’t say that I’ve ever seen the bedrock difference between divorce and annulment – other than that bit of language. It certainly seems that Pope Francis’s comment is correct – an annulment is simply a document you get to allow you to receive communion and remarry, and you get it by paying the appropriate amount of money to go through the process.
Kyle,
Not sure if you missed it, but my bottom line is that “Married Catholic couples have a duty to witness to the sanctity of lifelong, indissoluble marriage between one man and one woman and the many blessing which come with it.”
Joe
I mistakenly omitted the reference for the 4th paragraph, to which I added bracketed comments:
“With an annulment, a divorced Catholic is allowed to remarry in the church ….In 1968 only 338 annulments were granted in the United States….[Though the numbers have come down, as of 1997] the U.S. church approves more than 50,000 every year. ‘An annulment is, essentially, a conclusion based upon evidence that (what) would appear to have been a solid and binding marriage was, in fact, not,” said Monsignor Edward Scharfenberger, judicial vicar of the Dioceses of New York [now bishop of Albany, New York]….U.S. churches grant 75 percent of all Catholic annulments around the world.”
(CNN, 7/6/1997 (http://www.cnn.com/US/9707/06/annuled.vows/))
Sorry about that!