Ars Moriendi – Learning to Die Well

Christ is Risen, Alleluia!

He is Risen and the whole world rejoices. At the Easter Vigil we sat in darkness as our tiny candles flickered and we sang the long story of Salvation history. It’s a story full of saints and sinners, obedience and entitlement, life and death.

As we were reminded on Ash Wednesday: we are dust, and to dust we shall return. But at Easter, with His Resurrection, Christ has made our dust into something triumphant. He has made death itself into something we can greet – as St. Francis did – with a smile and a name.

Sister Death

Praise be you, My Lord, through our Sister Bodily Death,
From whom no one living can escape. — St. Francis of Assisi

One of the ways Catholics have traditionally prepared for death is by personalizing her. “Sister Death,” “Brother Death,” “The Angel of Death” – various titles allow us to form a relationship to death. We learn not only to “remember your death,” but to prepare for it. In many ways, the traditional approach to death allows each of us to see death as a guest who may come at any time and prepare our souls to welcome her.

It’s not a popular image in the modern world. For many of us, death is something to fear and hide from. For a sadly increasing number of people, death is something to seek out and force. A relationship of quiet preparation and expectation is hard to cultivate.

Fortunately, we have two millennia of holy men and women to guide us! Whether martyrs or hermits, monks or laymen, the Church is full of saints who walked confidently to their deaths full of trust in the goodness of God. As we learn to die well, we learn to imitate those saints in life and death.

Memento Mori

Vita brevis breviter in brevi finietur,

Mors venit velociter quae neminem veretur,

Omnia mors perimit et nulli miseretur.

Ad mortem festinamus peccare desistamus.

“Life is brief” sung the living in Medieval Europe, “to death we are hastening,” so devout Christians kept death before them always. Thoughts and prayers, songs and devotions sought to prepare the living to meet Sister Death and face Christ in Judgment.

But in our modern world, it’s often hard to keep death before us. In a culture where the bodies of our dead are whisked away and presented to us in only the most controlled and sterile situations, our meetings with death are often limited and unnatural. Unlike our ancestors, the modern rituals around death exist “to prove life isn’t tragic” – ignoring the obvious tragedies that press around us in this vale of tears.

That might sound a little depressing, but the truth is, we’re healthier and happier when we can accept life’s tragedies alongside its joys. Just as the celebrations of Easter are deeper when we participate in the penances of Lent, life itself is richer when we live it acknowledging its brevity.

The theme of memento mori has regained a bit of its popularity in recent years too. Books, journals, and t-shirts bearing the reminder clutter up online marketplaces. But while some of these items may help guide our minds toward death, they can too often become distractions. Ultimately, reflecting on death is deeply personal – something all the mass-produced devotional sets can barely touch.

Preparation

Of course, meditating on death is ultimately in vain if it doesn’t prompt us to live well. Medieval Catholics embraced the practice of living in preparation for a good death. Many an illuminated Book of Hours contains a brief Ars Moriendi (guides on the “art of dying well”).

How do we prepare for death? The Church, of course, has a Sacrament set aside for the dying – Extreme Unction (or Last Rites) – the Sacrament that anoints the dying and covers them in all the support the Church can offer.

But years before our reception of Last Rites, we can begin our ars moriendi in simple ways throughout our lives.

Saints and Angels

An easy way to begin preparing to die well is to become acquainted with those who have walked the path before us. St. Joseph, the patron of good death, is an ideal saint to start with. He is famous for his willingness to reach out in comfort to the dying, just as Christ and the Blessed Mother comforted him during his death.

Along with St. Joseph, it’s important to build a life-long relationship with our guardian angel. Too often, we treat our angels as childhood “imaginary friends.” Even the common prayer to our angel is childish. But our guardian angels are the greatest help we have in our journey toward Eternity. They know us and are intensely focused on our salvation. If you’re working to rebuild a long-neglected devotion to your own guardian angel there’s a simple prayer to help:

O Angel of God,
Who are appointed by Divine Mercy
to be my guardian,
Enlighten, protect, direct, and govern me
this day [or night]. Amen.

Devotional Practices

The devotional life of the Church is full of ways to remember our death and direct that remembrance toward Christ again and again. Of course, the rosary is an ideal devotion in the practice of cultivating an ars moriendi – the Mother of God buried her husband, her Son, and eventually joined Him in Eternity herself. Her maternity is ideally suited to both the joys and sorrows we face.

Along with meditating through the mysteries of the rosary, the brown scapular is another Marian devotion that can prepare us to greet death peacefully. A priest can institute you into the brown scapular, and then you can continue wearing the scapular as a sign of your devotion throughout your life.

Devotion to the Souls in Purgatory is another ideal way to practice memento mori. The Souls are longing for the prayers and penances of the living. When we give those prayers, they remember us as well. When those Souls reach Heaven, they don’t forget the prayers of the faithful on earth. Hospitality is never wasted. When we offer hospitality to people within the world, we’re blessed; and when we offer hospitality (through our prayers and sacrifices) to the Souls in Purgatory, we’re blessed again by the prayers of our friends.

Ars Moriendi

At its heart, ars moriendi, the art of dying well, is simply the art of living well. When we live our lives in communion with Christ and His Church, in charity and devotion, then we build up a work of art within our lives that transcends death and moves with us into Eternity.

One of the deepest joys of the Christian life is that it is a walk toward death, where Christ Himself meets us with a smile: “Well done, my good and faithful servant…. Come, share your master’s joy.” (Matthew 25:23)