The Exceptional Gift of the Ordinary Life

Run-of-the-mill. Average. Common. These are just some of the less appealing words most people would not want to be used to describe their own lives. After all, who wants their life to be labeled dull or uninteresting? For many, the “ordinary” is associated with a lack of importance and significance.

Yet, all of us do live our lives at the pace of one day at a time, 24 hours a day, 60 minutes in an hour: 86,400 seconds in a day. Regardless of how breathtakingly exciting or slow-as-molasses one’s life feels like, each new day has the same number of seconds, minutes and days, building on one another to make up the story of our lives. Contrary to what may seem to make more worldly sense, I believe it is the ordinary days we live, which bring the most meaning and sense to our existence.

Anywhere and Everywhere, Every Single Day

On October 8, 1967, at an outdoor Mass at the University of Navarra in Spain, St. Josemaria Escriva (referred to by Pope John Paul II as “the Saint of the ordinary”) preached a homily which spoke to the spirit and essence of his teachings on the sanctification of daily work and ordinary life. Entitled “Passionately Loving the World”, he said:

(…)God is calling you to serve him in and from the ordinary, secular and civil activities of human life. He waits for us everyday, in the laboratory, in the operating theatre, in the army barracks, in the university chair, in the factory, in the workshop, in the fields, in the home and in all the immense panorama of work. Understand this well: there is something holy, something divine hidden in the most ordinary situations, and it is up to each one of you to discover it.

This, for me, was a game-changer, when I first learned of it so very many years ago and to this day it continues to be so. I can stay where I am and keep on doing what I am doing as a wife, a mother, a caterer by profession, and a friend to many and there is meaning and purpose in all of it. It is God’s presence which changes everything. Jesus Himself shows us that these human interactions and relationships, the work we do and the care we show one another are necessary and essential in our own love for God and profession of faith.

Ordinary Conversations

What may seem to the rest of the world to be unimportant and largely insignificant are what make up the bulk of our lives: the daily conversations with the people we live and work, the routine we follow, the schedules we keep. These are what we may take for granted because they do not seem to be essential or exciting enough to merit attention. Jesus, though, knew differently.

His conversation with a Samaritan woman drawing water from the well at a time of day when nobody else would be there leads to a life-changing moment for her. What normal, ordinary thing does the Samaritan woman do then? She goes to town (literally) and tells everybody about Jesus:

So the woman left her water jar, and went away into the city, and said to the people, “Come, see a man who told me all that I ever did. Can this be the Christ?”  They went out of the city and were coming to him. (Jn 4:28-30)

A Chance Encounter

That one conversation, at midday by the well, began as ordinarily as any conversation does. Someone speaks and another listens. They exchange thoughts, express ideas and they listen. Many times, it is good to pay attention to subtle signs indicating the need to pursue an opportunity for a conversation. That – plus what must have been a subconscious divine inspiration – led me to a short but meaningful exchange with a lady named Ellen in church this morning.

We were both in the ladies room and smiled at each other – a bit of a feat when one is wearing a mask. She asked what was happening in the church and what the Mass was for. I told her that it was the feast day of St. Josemaria Escriva.

“Ahhh! Okay, so all of those people are in Opus Dei?” she asked.

“Probably many of them are, but not all. I am a member of Opus Dei,” I added. She nodded her head, kept smiling and began to turn away. On impulse (or divine inspiration), I asked her, “Who are you praying for? Is there someone or something you want us to pray for?”

I am not sure what I expected her to say; perhaps something general about her family or health. Instead, she paused for a split second, nodded her head firmly and began to name people she knew who had suffered because of the coronavirus. She named four different people, all of whom had died of Covid-19, and as she finished telling me all of this, she wiped her eyes of tears. I repeatedly mentioned Ellen’s intentions in my prayers before and during the Mass and afterward.

Ordinary Gestures

Had I not asked Ellen impulsively about her prayer intentions, I would not have known to pray for her or the people she mentioned. It was clear that she hurt inside, for the loss of these people and the suffering of those who mourned for those who had died. It was clear only after I had asked her about who we could pray for. Had I rushed away or not bothered to have that conversation with her, I would not have known.

I am grateful for having had that chance encounter with Ellen. It was a small 2-minute conversation, in the ladies room of a church in Toronto. We smiled through masks, an ordinary gesture which has helped to make conversations like the one we had possible. These natural and small acts of amiability mean so much more now than they ever did because the effort needs to be more pronounced. These ordinary gestures are visible signs of our humanity: a smile, a glance, a look of affection. Moreover, they help to make Christ present in our midst: “And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me.’” (Mt 25:40)

Brick by Brick, Piece by Piece

“Have you seen how that imposing building was built? One brick upon another. Thousands. But, one by one. And bags of cement, one by one. And blocks of stone, each of them insignificant compared with the massive whole. And beams of steel. And men working, the same hours, day after day…

Have you seen how that imposing building was built?… By dint of little things!”

(The Way, point 823, Josemaria Escriva)

These ordinary things of our lives make up the foundation of what we count on when the unusual and the unexpected suddenly occur. Steadfast faith and perseverance are built on every day which passes and every moment which happens. In moments of trial and difficulty, we often cannot imagine how we can get through the pain or the challenges we face. It is then, during those moments of extraordinary circumstances, we must remember it is not we who trudge along bearing the weight of the world on our own, but our Father God Himself Who sustains us. We are never given that which we cannot bear with His help.

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” (1Cor.10:13)

Just Happy to Be Here

Every day we wake up to a brand new day is another joyful opportunity to make present the love of Christ in the world. The ordinary things we do are insignificant only in so far as we fail to see the real meaning behind every conversation, every gesture, every act of love:

I assure you, my children, that when a Christian carries out with love the most insignificant everyday action, that action overflows with the transcendence of God. That is why I have told you so often, and hammered away at it, that the Christian vocation consists in making heroic verse out of the prose of each day. Heaven and earth seem to merge, my children, on the horizon. But where they really meet is in your hearts, when you sanctify your everyday lives… (Passionately Loving the World, Josemaria Escriva)